Elementary (3-5)

Middle School (6-8)

SEL Core Competencies: 

• Self-Awareness: identifying emotions, experiencing self-efficacy, linking feelings, values and thoughts, demonstrating honesty and integrity 

• Self-Management: managing one’s emotions, exhibiting self-discipline 

• Social Awareness: taking others’ perspectives, recognizing strengths in others, demonstrating empathy and compassion, identifying diverse social norms, showing concern for the feelings of others 

• Relationship Skills: communicating effectively, developing positive relationships, showing leadership in groups, resolving conflicts constructively, seeking or offering support when needed 

ELA Standards: Listening and Speaking, Writing 

Social Studies Theme: Individual Development and Identity 

Students will identify the factors that can lead to conflict. 

Students will map a conflict to better understand the events that can lead to a “kaboom” moment.

This lesson follows a common simple structure: I do, we do, you do.

I do: 

• Draw a “conflict map” on a piece of chart paper or dry-erase board (consider having this prepared in advance).

• Give an example and explain how several seemingly small acts might lead to a “kaboom” moment filling in the chart as you go.

• Give some options for how that “kaboom” moment might be resolved, filling in the “down the staircase” side of the chart as you explain.

• Ask: What do you notice?

• Why, in this case, do you think the “kaboom moment” happened?
  What led to the conflict?

We do: 

• Work together as a large group, use a scenario from the students, and map a second conflict. 

• Ask: Why, in this case, do you think the “kaboom moment”
  happened? What led to the conflict?

• Ask: Looking at the two conflicts that we’ve just mapped,
  what are some things that can be done to restore after a “kaboom
  moment”/after a conflict occurs? 

You do: 

• Break into small groups of 3-5 students. 

• Groups should work together to choose their own conflict and draw both sides of the steps (leading to the conflict, the aftermath and the resolution). Circulate and help groups who may have trouble getting started by asking some leading questions. If you think your students may get stuck on coming up with a conflict, you could prepare scenarios in advance and let them choose or have them draw a scenario to map. 

• Depending on your numbers and time, have each group share out their poster when they’re done or have them share with one other group. 

Ask: Looking at all of the different scenarios we explored
today, what do you think causes conflict? Some ideas to include: 

• An imbalance of power or perceived power. 

• Differences in values and beliefs. 

• Differences in personality/personal preferences (such as energy levels, or comfort with physical touch).

• Misunderstanding someone else’s intentions.

Have students consider the following questions on their own and create a visual representation that can be shared with the class. 

1. How can we support each other in our community so that we have less “kaboom moments”?

2. What do I personally need when I’m having or have had a “kaboom moment”?

 Have students create a list of what they personally need after a “kaboom moment”

Have students reflect on conflicts they’ve had in the past. How could they have handled it differently? Have them write a fictional story about handling a conflict productively. 

Create a “kaboom moment” anchor chart for the wall of your space. 

Encourage students to share their stories with the class.

Create a peer mediators club/group at your school. 

Create a “kaboom moment” comic book story and share it with a younger class. 

Start using restorative circles in your classroom to restore after a kaboom/conflict – there are many great resources for this including this  Toolkit:
Peacebuilding Circles from Learning for Justice and A
Guide to Using Circles Classroom Circles from Peaceful Schools NC.